The Top Five Strangest Aphrodisiacs in the World Posted at 2/12/2009 02:15:00 AM 0 comments (+) 1) Bat Meat

Vampires might cringe at the irony, but in Indonesia and Malaysia, eating bat meat as a way to spice things up in the bedroom is common practice. These creatures are easy to find, cost virtually nothing, and have the local reputation of being extremely reliable in the sexual aid department. Of course, before you can enjoy the aphrodisiac effect, you have to get past the look of your dinner first. In fact, bats are often served whole like a Maine lobster, which means an up-close-and-personal with Dracula's alter-ego. The rodent-like body, the leathery wings, the creepy teeth...you get the idea. But hey, you could always just keep your eyes closed, pretend the bat is really a chicken breast, and fantasize about all the fun you're going to have with your partner afterwards. And if you get an overwhelming urge to suck on his or her neck during the night, you'll know why.

2) Rhinoceros Urine

If you're willing to travel far and wide for the sake of a hot night in bed, then I would strongly suggest purchasing a plane ticket to
India or Nepal. That's because both of these countries have long used rhinoceros urine as a way to increase sexual desire and virility. But wait, it's not like these horned giants will just walk up to you in the street and offer to pee in a cup (although if for some strange reason a rhino does do this, please email me as I would find that most amusing). No, you need to visit a place like the Kathmandu Zoo, where genuine rhinoceros urine is sold alongside T-shirts and tote bags. The animal keepers there collect the fresh pee every single day and make sure it's bottled quickly to guarantee purity. Just drink a glass shortly before having sex, and turn a regular old night in the sack into a mind-blowing jungle boogie.

3) Big-Bottomed Ants

It seems highly unlikely that Paris Hilton would ever look at an insect and say, "That's hot." Still, if she visited Colombia and actually learned a little about the local species called "atta laevigata"--also known as big-bottomed ants for their ultra-bloated mid-sections--the infamous heiress might change her mind. These critters are apparently so reliable as an aphrodisiac that they are routinely given as wedding gifts to help the newly-married couple get off to a wild between-the-sheets start. However, only the queens can be eaten--once they've had their appendages ripped off, of course. And word on the South American street is that big-bottomed ants taste absolutely divine after being oven-roasted. But I suppose if you know you're going to have fantastic sex afterwards, any pre-bedroom insect snack can seem like a ten-course gourmet meal.

4) Snake Blood

You might not like these slithery creatures, but you could like what their blood does for you. Yes, according to Asian lore, snake blood is one of the most potent sex-enhancers on the planet. Poisonous varieties are preferred for this particular purpose (the venom is only dangerous if you're bitten), although you do have a choice as to how you'd like to sample that aphrodisiac cocktail. Local bartenders are more than happy to stir the blood into plain water or rice wine to make it more palatable. But if you're a true diehard, then slurping the blood straight from a newly-made puncture in the snake's tail is the way to go. The freshness of the latter option is supposed to guarantee extra sexual prowess, but either way, the bedroom effects should hit you in under ten minutes. So remember, kinky travelers: make sure you pick a snake blood establishment that's close to your hotel room if you want to get back in time.

5) Reindeer Antlers

Who knew antlers could make you so horny? It just goes to show that you can never judge a furry Christmas icon by its seemingly innocent cover. That's because deep in the heart of Scandinavia where re
indeer hang out in herds, their velvety antlers are collected and ground up into a much-coveted fine powder that Lapland locals call "poronsarvijauhe." That powder is then dissolved in boiling water and taken as a chalky hot drink a couple of hours before the bedroom Olympics are scheduled to begin. In fact, this aphrodisiac has a reputation for being so powerful that store owners as far away as China pay a Donald-Trump-sized fortune just to import it. All of which leads me to believe that Santa and Mrs. Claus must be getting it on a whole lot up there at the North Pole.

Now tell the truth. You went through the above list and thought, "Hmm, maybe I could try that..." at least once or twice. Well, congratulations! You're human! And you also just proved my point. Because at the end of the day, people should never underestimate the power of sex--or what disgusting things they might be willing to eat or drink in the hope of enjoying it even more. So here's wishing you plenty of bedroom fun, however you get it! Cheers!

By Suzanne Donahue

Labels: love buzz